Laughter and celebrations

I can't remember the exact day I decided I wanted to live again.  I can't even remember how long I have been depressed.  Did the depression start when I couldn't get out of bed?  Was it when I couldn't stop crying?  Is it the day I realized my life was changing before my eyes?  Was it years before, as the pot was simmering?  Do you consider it started when the pot boiled over?  I just know it started some day before the day I decided I want to live.

I am proud I did this alone with the help the internet, a few good people, but NOT DOCTORS.

I know there are great doctors out there, but fate didn't lead me to one of them.  I have this to be grateful, because only I know myself.  If anyone was going to help get me out of depression, it was me.

I am happy to report my symptoms have subsided.  The zap feeling in my brain going into my arms and torso has almost become a thing of the past.  I may have had twenty of them today, but I was moving a lot today.  The twenty I had were very mild, staying closer to the head and a wee bit down my neck.

Kombucha has helped my colon and stomach symptoms.  I can't even tell you one place I may have an ache or pain tonight.  I am pain free.  Supplements, diet, (a little excersize) light therapy, cognitive therapy, allowing myself to feel and take the time for grief, journaling, listening to my body, rejoicing in feeling emotions, manifestation, brainstorming....these are just some of my favorite things.
These were my precious tools leading me to my laughter.  Growing into this day through understanding brought me around again.
The only thing I ever missed out on is laughter  
Imagine a life where you had EVERYTHING you needed but laughter.  What a neat goal to have.

LOL!

ROFL!

LMAO!

ROFLMAO!